Raphael as a big brother

The last 4 weeks of my pregnancy Raphael was a lot more attached to me. He got upset faster if he doesn’t get what he wants. But that might also just be the age since he was getting closer to the terrible 2. 

When I was pregnant I used to point at my belly and say ”You’re baby brother Noah is in there” and at some point Raphael was pointing at my belly when I was asking for Noah and also giving him kisses which was really sweet. Of course he didn’t know that there was an actual baby in there. 

I was convinced that he’d have a hard time in the beginning adapting to the new family constellation. But quite the contrary happened. Even though he was a little skeptical at the hospital, he is really sweet with Noah, from the first day we brought him home. Seeing Raphael grow in his role as a big brother is such an amazing thing! 

When he was around 1.5 years old we started giving him little jobs – such as helping me get the groceries into the fridge, helping daddy get the trash out, getting the laundry basket etc. He is such a good helper and he really takes these little jobs serious. If we’d do it without him he’d get very upset and make a scene.

So that’s what I did, right from the beginning.
I included Raphael into all the “baby stuff” I had to do.
When I need to change Noah I would ask him to bring me the wipes and help me change his baby brother. When I need to feed Noah I’d say “Noah needs milk now, he is hungry” and I’d ask Raphael to bring me the nursing pillow. 

Everytime I say “Noah needs to eat” now,  Raphael says milk” right away and gets the pillow by himself before I could even ask him. 
When Noah starts crying Raphael runs over to see if he’s okay and starts to do the “Shhh” sound. Sometimes he even looks for the pacifier and tries to put it in his mouth (under my supervision of course). What surprised me most was the patience Raphael brings towards me when I have to nurse Noah. He would just hang with us and read his books (most of the time)!

Noah was part of the family the moment we brought him home. My heart is smiling seeing them both together. I could start crying every time I see Raphael tries calming down his baby brother. It really is the cutest!! 

Every morning after Raphael wakes up he asks for his baby brother. He used to call him “Nomi” since he couldn’t say Noah which he can now!! He is such a caring big brother and a really great helper – I am so thankful to have him by my side. And I couldn’t be more proud of him. 

Of course he has his moments when he’d be very upset if I am not responding to his needs right away. And we do for sure have our bad days. Sweating and rushing from crying baby to a 2 year old toddler who refuses to get changed, when it is not even past 9 AM and I’m already on the verge of another nervous breakdown. So – as you can see just the normal everyday madness with two kids. And definitely a lot more difficult under those quarantine circumstances.

But at the end of the day everyone was loved and we are happy to have each other and that’s all that matters. 

I am so grateful to have my two baby boys in my life even though they drive me nuts sometimes. It’s been really challenging the last few days since Raphael is having a hard time expressing his emotions which includes throwing food and hitting, climbing out of his crib and teething.
Do I miss my life before kids sometimes? I would lie if I’d say no.
But do I want to have it back? Heck, no! Not for anything in the world could I ever go back to not be the mom to Raphael and Noah. 


Leave a Reply